Halloween Hoodlums

Look at this band of Halloween Hoodlums.  Why is Dancer the only once not acting like a nut?

Living Off-Line

I have really been working on my off-line life lately.  Over the past 10 years or so, I've spent way too much time online.  I've developed some really great online friendships but I think there must be a balance and I wasn't finding that balance.  I hate to admit it but when I get sucked into the screen, I'm ignoring my family.  This isn't something I want for myself or for them.  So, I decided that along with the other minimalist things I'm working towards that I also needed to work on getting that balance between off-line and online.

On Saturday, Oct 23, I decided that I was going cold-turkey for the day.  I stayed off of the computer the entire day.  It was tough!  Thank goodness I had some books that needed to be read and finished up for two book discussion groups, so that helped me focus on keeping my mind occupied so that I didn't completely lose it and give in.  Since then, I have been limiting my computer time to, at most, 1 hour a day.  I have so much wrapped up into my online life that some things have had to be put on hold.  I'm only making an exception this evening so that I can blog here.

I'm seriously considering giving up my pet project, Free K-12 Education.  If I don't give it up, it will definitely stay as a hobby.  I'm just not willing to spend so much time on it anymore.  I thought I wanted to build it into something that could pay me back for the effort, but I'm not so sure anymore.  I have so many other wonderful things that I want to do and I just don't see how I can balance that plus pursue all of these other things.

I really think that a quote I posted on my mini blog last week changed something in me.  It flipped a switch.  I had an enlightening.  Here it is, in case you don't regularly read my mini blog...

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” - Mahatma Gandhi

I have so much living to do.  I have so much learning to do.  I am no longer willing to settle for so much of my time being sucked into the black hole of so many of my former online activities.  I can't get that time back.  I have to decide what's really important in life and focus my time and energies there.

The Start of My Minimalist Journey

Yesterday I started reading "The Simple Guide to a Minimalist Life" by Leo Babauta.  Mr. Babauta starts off talking about why he's a minimalist, the benefits of being a minimalist, discussing what true necessities are and simplifying what we do with our time.  Then he jumps right into tackling clutter, part of which is the clutter on our computer.  So, last night started to follow his suggestions on cleaning up my computer's desktop.  I started with condensing files and then I hid the icons from my desktop and added a beautiful desktop background.  I didn't take a screenshot of my before but here is what my desktop looks like now.  I have a rotating background and here are two shots of my desktop...

Today I took it a step further and cleaned up my News Feed on Facebook.  I now have only the most important updates from friends, family, and pages on my News Feed.  Facebook can be a time-suck and I think this will make it easier and quicker for me to keep up with the people and pages that are most important to me.

I have also started on moving files and pictures to my Google Docs and to Picasa for storage, at the suggestion of Mr. Babauta.  [I already use both of those services but I will be making a point to use them for nearly everything.]  They will be easier for me to have access to all of my files no matter what computer I am at.  They will also free up space on my hard-drive, which is in short supply on my laptop.

Mr. Babauta has also gone completely paperless.  I'm not sure exactly how I could make that work in my life yet but I will certainly look for more ways to cut down on my paper clutter.  I already pay nearly all of my bills online and don't receive paper bills.  Just looking around my room, I can see paper-sourced items like books and magazines that I could go paperless with.

I have lots more work to do on this journey but I think if I work at this everyday, always looking for more ways to reduce and release, then I could really make some serious progress over the next few months.

Ooey Gooey Slimy Fun

Today, Dancer and I did a chemistry experiment.  We made glowing slime.  We were supposed to be doing it with a live online class but the instructor never showed.  One of the moms who was waiting online with us found the link to the video and instructions, so we ended up doing it on our own.

the supplies

our mess after making our slime

"I'm melting, I'm melting."

flat as a pancake

frozen slime looks cool!

There are some other questions that are with the instructions that we still need to answer.  We still have to heat this up in the microwave to see what it does, see if it picks up the print off of a newspaper, and change a few ingredients to see how the results change.

It was really cool to do this.  I was almost giddy.  I love science, always have.

Blogging... My Take on the Do's and Don'ts

I have been consistently blogging since August 2005 and over that time I have developed my own likes and dislikes about the blogging world and what makes a good blog.  Here is my take on the whole thing...

Do...

• have a unique voice!  We all have one.  Don't blog about what you think your readers want.  That's like an author writing for their fans or an artist basing their creativity on what they think someone will buy.  Yuck!   I don't want to read a blog where I can't see a blogger's unique voice.   I want to really be able to tell who that person is and what they stand for by the way they express themselves.

• use Feedburner!   For goodness sakes, if you're going to blog burn your feed!   I've run across so many great blogs lately that either haven't burned their feed or don't have all of their available subscribe settings turned on within Feedburner.  When I find a really great blog, one that's worth having delivered to my email inbox, and can't find an option to subscribe via email, I get a little frustrated.  Sometimes I'll ask the author to make that option available and sometimes I'll just burn their feed myself and subscribe to it that way.  Make it easy on your readers to keep up with you!

• make your blog pleasing to the eye.   Clean up your sidebars... using pleasing colors... post pictures... make it easy to navigate.   I hope those things are self-explanatory, if not, leave me a comment and I'll elaborate.   Let's just say that you can have the best content in the world but if your blog hurts my eyes and I see that you don't care enough to organize your sidebars, then I won't be back!


Don't...

• follow the crowd!  Ok, so the mommy bloggers are all the rage now.   There's a million and one blogs all about couponing and weekly deals.   If you seen one, you've pretty much seen them all.   I have a few that I follow... why?... because I can see their unique voice!

• compare your blog to others.  This comes back to that unique voice.  Your blog, it's look and content, should reflect you.   One of my all time favorite bloggers, TidyMom, has a blog that reflects who she is.  She bakes, she cooks, she's tidy... and I don't do any of those things well!  Which is why I love her soooo much.  I get to peek into a life that is totally opposite of mine.   I get inspiration from her to be my unique self, here on my blog and out in the world.

• blog just to make money.   Blech.  I don't know about you but I can tell which blogs are only out there to make some cash.   There's nothing wrong with getting paid for your work on your blog but there's a fine line that needs to be walked with this.

So be creative, express yourself, blog about who you are and what you stand for.... just be you and be real... and make it easy for those of us who like your blog to follow you.

I Am Not The Mom...

I am not the mom...

who has it all together
who's house is always clean
who's yard is mowed and garden is trimmed
who cooks dinner every night... I don't even like to cook!
who's bed is made
who's laundry is done

I am the mom...

who hangs out with her teenager
who doesn't mind being the chauffeur to all of her daughter's activities
who is mindful to nurture the relationship I have with her father
who's teen still wants to hold hands with her
who enjoys her teen's company

Relationships are more important than things.
Time is more important than money.
Love, nurture, and respect are the most important things in life.

Library Tour

Wednesday, along with some fellow homeschoolers, we went to an informative talk and took a tour of the city library.  We learned all about the Dewey Decimal System, then had an extensive tour of the children's and young adult departments.  We also learned all about the online databases and the best way to search the library system's catalog of holdings.

I thought I knew nearly everything about our library but I ended up learning some new things that will be very helpful to us.  I didn't know that our library had access to the EBSCO Database.  The librarians showed us how to use the microfilm and while we were touring the children's department, I found out where all of the folklore was shelved.  I ended up checking out about 10 books of Japanese folklore from that section.

We updated Dancer's library card so that she can now check out anything from the library.  Their age for an adult card is 13 and Dancer is 14 now.  I had them set-up online access for her and while we were checking out, I also found out that the library baskets can be checked out, too.  That made it a whole lot easier to carry all of those books home.

The morning started out pretty rough, since Dancer really didn't want to get up so early.  We did the apple orchard trip the day before, so that made an early morning two days in a row.  But she got to see and hang-out with some friends and she learned some new things about our library.  She was fine and was glad we went by the time it was all over.

Apple Orchard Trip

Tuesday we joined some fellow homeschoolers on a field trip to the Okaw Valley Apple Orchard. We learned how their family owned orchard operates, got to pick our own apples, and learned how their apple cider is made.  We had a great time.  The weather was perfect and we got to see some of our friends.

picking our own apples

honey bees are vital to apple production.  did you know you can rent honey bees?

apples are dumped onto a belt where they are washed...

and sorted.  the apples that are too small go into the bins for apple sauce and cider.  the apples on the platform are bagged and weighed and then sold in their country store.

this is their cider press.  this machine presses the apples into mush that is then pressed to get the cider.

the tank behind this holds the cider that is then pumped into gallon jugs through these nozzles.

after the tour we had apple crisp donuts and apple cider slushies and then it was time to play with friends.

Before we headed home, we bought some more apple crisp donuts to share with Dodger and I got some homemade jalapeño mustard and fresh ground horseradish sauce.  I haven't tried the mustard but the horseradish is the best I've ever tasted.  I'll never go back to the store-bought, processed stuff.

Wasting Time

Do you ever find yourself completely lost in the web, unable to free yourself from it's lure. You get up to "do something" only to find yourself back in-front of the screen moments later unsure of how your plan to "do something" got off-track once again.  I did that all day today.  I spent nearly half of my day reading and answering emails, reading Facebook, reading blogs, and just wasting time.  The few times that I did manage to pry myself away from the computer to get some housework done, I always ended up back in the computer chair without having accomplished much.

I wonder, though, what is wasted time?  Is it spending too much time online or in front of the TV?  How much is too much?  Who draws that line?

I still struggle with answers to that.  Conventional culture says that too much "screen time" is bad for us and wasteful.  But I always question conventional culture's ideas.  Was the housework that I didn't get done today more important than the great blogs I read and discovered today?  Was it more important than replying to important discussions on my favorite Yahoo Group?

What other things should we be accomplishing instead of "wasting time"?  What about these things are important?  What's our motivation behind accomplishing these things?

I have so many questions and the answers aren't quite clear to me yet.

Teenagers are Awesome

Ok, so that's not a popular thought among parents but it's my perspective.

Depression, Schedules, and Balance

Tuesday night Dancer told me that she thinks she's depressed. She said she feels lethargic most of the time and is only truly happy when she's dancing. She expressed some other concerns to me, too. I told her that most of her concerns and feelings were normal that there were many other people who felt the same way about things. I think it made her feel better to hear that. I told her that I felt her excessive computer time was contributing to her feelings of depression. I let her know that there was nothing wrong with spending time on the computer but that it's best used in balance with other things in her life. She has goals and dreams for herself and she needs to be conscious of where her energies are being spent.

{and just so you know... I have expressed all of this to her in the past... the only thing different now is that it's self-directed from her and not top-down from me. I am here as her facilitator, mentor, and friend. she was not given to my care to boss her around but to be here to guide her as she figures out who she is and what she wants.}

We tossed around ideas and she made up a daily tasks schedule that she wants to follow. She also asked me to start getting her up earlier in the morning and that she will start working on trying to get to bed earlier so that getting up at the time she wants to get up won't be so hard on her. She wants to get up early enough in the day so that she can attend to the things that will get her closer to pursuing her dreams so that by the afternoon she'll be free to spend time RPing (Roll Playing) and Facebooking with her friends.

So for the past 3 days I have gone to bed by 1:30am so that I could be up in time to get her up at 10am, the time she's chosen to have me wake her up. She has jumped into her daily tasks without anything from me but a "What do you want to do next?" Today she felt worn out from her week and decided to sleep lightly till noon after I woke her up. After that needed rest, she was up and at it.

I also makes sure she takes her vitamins daily and I'm having her take Mustard Flower Essence to help with the lethargy and depression. I read up on depression (as if I didn't already know enough about it from my own struggles with it) and I'm going to make sure that her diet promotes well-being, too. Today I suggested that we take a short walk everyday while the weather is still nice to get some sunlight and fresh air.

It feels good to once again be motivated to be a better mom and a better person over-all for the benefit of my daughter. From the very beginnings of her physical existence, she's been my motivation for all that I've done to be better and do better. I am so grateful that this parenting style promotes her openness and honesty with me. I know when I was her age, I would have never felt comfortable going to my mom and telling her I was depressed. I suffered through depression all through my teen years and half-way through my 20s. It was a terrible, dark time for me. And yet, without that struggle, I wouldn't be able to empathize and certainly wouldn't know the causes and the cures for it. Nothing we experience is in vain.

So, before I start to cry, I will end this blog post. I will plead with you to come along-side your kids and be their best friend. I ask of you to please be the parent you wish you had had. Treat your kids like the whole human beings that they are. They are not empty vessels waiting to be filled. They are already whole beings, they just need guidance from someone who's got more life experience. They need LOVE and understanding!